Thursday, April 4, 2013


Hardly a day goes by where I don't catch myself smiling at some memory from when I was in England. It was the happiest time of my life, and I really do miss it. however I know my life needs to move on, and I need to find something else to look forward to. I spent so much time preparing, and anticipating finally making it to the United Kingdom, and now I feel a little weird and I guess empty, for lack of a better word. One of my best friends is currently abroad on her European adventure, and another is planing hers for this summer. Hearing about their preparations made me sad that mine is over when they still have theirs to look forward to, but I wouldn't change a thing about where or when I went. I probably wouldn't have met the same people and had the same amazing experience. It could have turned out really horribly! I'm also a tiny bit glad that I was the first out of my friends to go. I guess it makes me feel a little bit more adventurous and fearless. After all, I am the only one who went completely on my own. It feels like so long ago that I was there, almost like it was just a dream and didn't really ever happen. I feel like a different person here than I was there, but I think a lot of it just has to do with the culture. Another thing is, I'm not sure how to stay in contact with the people I met there. Sometimes I just feel like making the effort is futile, since we're so far away.  I feel so isolated from the rest of them since they're all still together. I may just be paranoid, but I feel like they've all just forgotten about me, even though I know they were all really sad that I was leaving. I guess the whole thing is just a big mess of jumbled emotions! I want to start reading the journal I kept while I was there, but a part of me wants to wait and read each entry exactly a year after I wrote it. I'm not sure how much longer I can wait. I'm so glad I decided to write while I was there. Do any of you keep a journal? 

Keep Smiling,


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